Invalidating the self
When we are attacked, our survival instinct tells us to defend ourselves either through withdrawal or counter-attack.
Repeated withdrawal, though, tends to decrease our self-confidence and lead to a sense of powerlessness and depression.
The challenge for therapists is to find a way to lessen a client's suffering by gradually lessening the internal dissonance of self-invalidation - which happens in part through the experience of validation.Children often gradually internalize these messages about themselves, leading to a wide range of potential cognitions and self-talk in adulthood.Spradlin (2003) reminds us of the deep importance of acknowledging our challenges in life as important and real.Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) is primarily a disorder of the emotion regulation system.
BPD results from a biological predisposition to emotional dysregulation combined with certain dysfunctional (invalidating) environments which interact over time.The client may feel thrown off balance by the unexpected response.